it’s okay to be angry

April 23rd, 2020

It’s okay to be angry. Be totally angry. You don’t have to build it, bury it or chew it. Anger incinerates itself, and it will end.

It’s okay to be sad. Be sad. You don’t have to drug it, drag it out or plumb it. Sadness subsumes itself, and it will end.

It’s okay to be tired. Be nothing but tired. Fed up, over, out, done. You don’t have to fix it. Tiredness tires of itself, and it will end.

Be angry. Be sad. Be tired. Be as you are, not as you think you should be.

I bet you feel better already.


  1. my new mantra “be as you are, not as you think you should be.” as always~thank you

    Comment by Joanne M — November 9, 2010 @ 3:31 pm

  2. Swamped by the emotions of regret, I hold my little self and sing a lullabye.

    Comment by Angel C. — November 9, 2010 @ 3:34 pm

  3. Thank You, Maezen sensei.

    As always you are on-point with me.


    Comment by J. Andy Lambert — November 9, 2010 @ 3:35 pm

  4. Yes! I do feel better ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Comment by Roos — November 9, 2010 @ 3:42 pm

  5. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Angel Tatum Craddock and Andy Lambert, violetsblue. violetsblue said: itโ€™s okay to be angry | Karen Maezen Miller's Cheerio Road via @kmaezenmiller <3 <3 <3 […]

    Pingback by Tweets that mention itโ€™s okay to be angry | Karen Maezen Miller's Cheerio Road -- — November 9, 2010 @ 3:53 pm

  6. I read this and released a breath I didn’t know I was holding. Thank you, thank you, thank you. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Comment by Rebekah — November 9, 2010 @ 4:15 pm

  7. That’s exactly what I needed right now…I do feel better already ๐Ÿ™‚

    Comment by Katie — November 9, 2010 @ 6:00 pm

  8. I have struggled with all of this since I strapped myself in the thrill ride known as chemotherapy. This may not be what I want right now, but it’s what I have–and your wisdom has helped me to bow to it. Many thanks.

    Comment by Carol — November 9, 2010 @ 6:22 pm

  9. someone said to me this morning… the spirit doesn’t deal with should, thats the mind…the spirit always knows what to do…right now.

    Comment by kate — November 9, 2010 @ 7:11 pm

  10. Thank you Karen. I shared this with my daughter who is going through a rough time.

    Comment by Imelda — November 9, 2010 @ 8:42 pm

  11. I bow to the south.

    Nice photo.

    Comment by chris — November 9, 2010 @ 10:49 pm

  12. You do more and more with less and less. This one: nothing less than brilliant. Thank you.

    Comment by Katrina Kenison — November 10, 2010 @ 2:23 am

  13. I’d like to be grateful, because you are a gift.

    Comment by Swirly — November 10, 2010 @ 3:15 am

  14. this is just what i needed right now.
    thank you.

    Comment by stef — November 10, 2010 @ 4:12 am

  15. a soulful thank you for this, karen.

    Comment by melissa — November 10, 2010 @ 12:43 pm

  16. Thank you.

    Comment by Natasha — November 10, 2010 @ 12:56 pm

  17. Love the photo. Warmly, Karen

    Comment by Karen Wallace — November 10, 2010 @ 1:44 pm

  18. Great post. I was just having a talk with a friend about this.

    Comment by googlover — November 10, 2010 @ 2:24 pm

  19. I am so grateful for this. Had a real bad thing happen yesterday and I remembered reading this in the midst of chaos. One thing we can count on: nothing lasts.

    Comment by Nichole — November 10, 2010 @ 5:07 pm

  20. yes, I do feel better already.

    Comment by lisa field-elliot — November 10, 2010 @ 8:17 pm

  21. wise words to keep one in perspective. they come at a good time in my life. thank you for posting these thoughts.

    Comment by amy — November 13, 2010 @ 8:59 am

  22. I am constantly having to encourage patients to be what they feel. So many who are battling cancer confuse expressing such feelings with “weakness”…I try to tell them it takes a lot courage and strength to open our lives up!

    Thank you for the post

    Comment by Alan — November 14, 2010 @ 3:38 pm

  23. why is this so hard to remember?

    Comment by Alex T — March 28, 2011 @ 9:04 pm

  24. Cranky buddha.

    Comment by Maia — September 30, 2015 @ 8:37 am

  25. There are no words I needed to see more than those. And they were the first I saw when I “mindlessly” got online. Thank you.

    Comment by Lindsay k — September 30, 2015 @ 1:35 pm

  26. Wow, so simple words yet so inspiring. With your permission, would love to re-blog on my site
    Thank you for this post..

    Comment by Su Srikanth — September 30, 2015 @ 10:08 pm

  27. […] Read this amazing yet a simple post and I knew it did make me feel better. […]

    Pingback by “It is okay” | Memorabilia — September 30, 2015 @ 11:22 pm

  28. thankyou thankyou thankyou x

    Comment by Ruth Meaney — October 1, 2015 @ 2:27 am

  29. Thanks to Maezumi Roshi, who used to say:

    “Be who you are, not who you think you should be.”

    Which is the heart of it all
    (as is everything, by the way)

    Comment by Ingrid Shugetsu Appels — October 1, 2015 @ 8:31 am

  30. Love, and thank you.


    Comment by Clare — May 16, 2016 @ 11:54 am

  31. So appropriate for today! Had a real meltdown yesterday, feeling so sad and angry about life. Your message of “be who you are, not who you think you should be” was perfect and helped so much. Thank you

    Comment by Judith Rosko — May 16, 2016 @ 12:48 pm

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URL

Leave a comment

archives by month