For your automotive safety

January 8th, 2009

We have a new motor vehicle law here in California. It is a good law. There are about a billion worthwhile reasons to have it. Along the roadways there are portable lighted signs with the newest prohibition spelled out on them. It’s jarring to see, because I am flabbergasted that we actually need a law to inform and correct this behavior. And yet, it doesn’t go far enough.

Don’t text and drive.
Don’t sleep and drive.
Don’t read Braille and drive.
Don’t needlepoint and drive.
Don’t stir fry and drive.
Don’t tie shoelaces and drive.
Don’t repot plants and drive.
Don’t braid hair and drive.
Don’t count pennies and drive.
Don’t crack nuts and drive.
Don’t finger puppet and drive. Don’t even think about it.

Just don’t.


  1. Don’t finger puppet and drive?

    Comment by Kristin H. — January 8, 2009 @ 12:30 pm

  2. Hmmm. I’ve definitely been guilty of the last one. Do I really need to put away my ghouly, rubbery Halloween zombie finger puppet that’s been known to stop the screaming meanies from the back seat, even if I promise only to bring it out at red lights?

    Comment by Ms.Once — January 8, 2009 @ 2:36 pm

  3. LOL. love it. Isn’t it amazing that these have to be spelled out. I’ve seen guys shaving with portable razors and driving, people reading newspapers and driving, and women putting makeup on and driving.

    Comment by Busymomma66 — January 8, 2009 @ 5:26 pm

  4. Damn. I am SO busted.

    Comment by Jena Strong — January 8, 2009 @ 5:46 pm

  5. You forgot “Don’t balance your checkbook and drive.” Seriously. I know someone who does this.

    We are a multi-tasking society. And we are used to instant gratification. Seems like it’s getting harder and harder for people to slow down and just do one thing at a time.

    Comment by ZenMom — January 8, 2009 @ 7:47 pm

  6. I agree. We are a multi-tasking society. But as this law proves, we can never, never do more than one thing at a time. Attempt to do any of these at the same time and you will be instantly gratified by a collision which may or may not result in the ultimate slow down. PS No one ever learns this except the hard way.

    Comment by Karen Maezen Miller — January 8, 2009 @ 7:59 pm

  7. don;t forget mine, moisturizing and driving…I have been trying to kick the habit.

    Comment by Bridge — January 8, 2009 @ 8:21 pm

  8. Don’t put on makeup and drive! I’ve seen this — especially eye makeup. Drives me crazy.

    Comment by kathryn — January 8, 2009 @ 8:41 pm

  9. What ever happened to the days when all we did while driving was drive? Well, maybe those days never existed. I remember my parents eating and driving often. Plus there is the great pleasure of talking to the other folks in the car. Or praying aloud. Or pretending to have conversations with other people when i am alone in the car.

    But will i will definitely put my phone down more. I plead guilty to talking and texting while driving. Silly, I know. But I know better.

    Anybody seen Seven Pounds???

    Comment by GailNHB — January 8, 2009 @ 11:03 pm

  10. LOL!!!
    Crazy the things that need to be spelled out for those lacking the common sense gene.

    Comment by Cat — January 8, 2009 @ 11:51 pm

  11. Awwwwhhhh! C’mon Mom you’re no fun! No fun at all!

    Note: There are many reasons we left California but the abundance of oblivious people in traffic ranks high on the list.

    Comment by Shalet — January 9, 2009 @ 5:17 am

  12. A woman from work used to floss and drive, using a gadget that holds the thread tight. Grossed me out to think of her doing that with no water but just imagine seeing that in the rear view mirror as you’re driving. Yuckies.

    Comment by Mary Ann — January 10, 2009 @ 2:26 pm

  13. ah, california, I remember it well. I think I could actually pot a plant and drive at the same time here in virginia.

    Comment by curious girl (lisa) — January 10, 2009 @ 11:28 pm

  14. The advantage of talking to other people in the car and driving is that if you start to drive off the road, they will yell at you, a service the folks on the phone can’t do.

    I though I was a pretty good finger-puppetteer and driver, perhaps I should reconsider.

    I have to say, tho, that the California drivers are much kinder and more attentive that the DC area drivers (I live in the south Bay Area).

    Comment by Chris Austin-Lane — January 12, 2009 @ 11:49 pm

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